MoTown's Detroit Sports Pessimism thread

[Timone]

Here ya go, Mo.

Knock yourself out, bud!

[MoTown]

This is what I need today.

Lions: 3-1. Not bad. Until you realize that one is against the Cardinals in a game that they should have locked up in the third quarter. AND WHERE THE FUCK IS KICKALICIOUS???? He may be the greatest Norwegian athlete I've ever seen. Also I've only ever seen one Norwegian athlete. Also I have a soft spot for him due to the fact I'm 1/4 Norwegian. Speaking of Norway - fuck the Vikings. And the Twins.

Tigers: Headed to the playoffs for the third season in a row. I like it. Owned the Indians all season long. Then they got a no hitter thrown against them on the last game. That's a bad omen. A very bad omen. They basically took a week off because they didn't play any baseball in that Marlins series. You remember what happened the last time they took a week off during the season? They got swept by the San Francisco Giants! Not good, you guys. Not good. And why am I worried about the goddamn Indians??? Because they've won 40 games in a row and have a chip on their shoulder due to the fact the Tigers ass-raped them all season long.

Pistons: Is David Stern still the commish? Okay then.

Red Wings: I'm still hurt by the fact they blew a 3-1 series lead against the Blackhawks. That still stings. And I'm not sure they got any better in the offseason.

Shock: Man I miss this team. If only the WNBA could come back home to Detroit.



I'm stuck in a hotel in Lombard, IL. I'm going to have a few beers and see if my attitude changes.

[DrRay11]

This is what I need today.

Lions: 3-1. Not bad. Until you realize that one is against the Cardinals in a game that they should have locked up in the third quarter. AND WHERE THE FUCK IS KICKALICIOUS???? He may be the greatest Norwegian athlete I've ever seen. Also I've only ever seen one Norwegian athlete. Also I have a soft spot for him due to the fact I'm 1/4 Norwegian. Speaking of Norway - fuck the Vikings. And the Twins.

Tigers: Headed to the playoffs for the third season in a row. I like it. Owned the Indians all season long. Then they got a no hitter thrown against them on the last game. That's a bad omen. A very bad omen. They basically took a week off because they didn't play any baseball in that Marlins series. You remember what happened the last time they took a week off during the season? They got swept by the San Francisco Giants! Not good, you guys. Not good. And why am I worried about the goddamn Indians??? Because they've won 40 games in a row and have a chip on their shoulder due to the fact the Tigers ass-raped them all season long.

Pistons: Is David Stern still the commish? Okay then.

Red Wings: I'm still hurt by the fact they blew a 3-1 series lead against the Blackhawks. That still stings. And I'm not sure they got any better in the offseason.

Shock: Man I miss this team. If only the WNBA could come back home to Detroit.



I'm stuck in a hotel in Lombard, IL. I'm going to have a few beers and see if my attitude changes.

One of my buddies used to live out in Lombard.

It sucks LOL

[Timone]

The Pistons losing to Cleveland in '07 still infuriates me. If "we" get knocked out of the playoffs by the Indians I'm DONE with sports!

[MoTown]

Alright... had a few G&T's and feeling much more positive. New Outlook:

Tigers: 3-1 over the A's. Who the fuck are the A's starting in the second game??? You're going to tell me this no-name assclown thinks he can hang with Verlander? JUSTIN VERLANDER??? Forget about his "below average" season that he's had this year. He's still Justin FUCKING Verlander. Max has got game one against that stupid fatass. Verlander will bukake on Sonny Gray. Sanchez will dance on Jarrod Parker's grave and Fister will, well, fist Dan Straily. I'm giving them one win because Phil Coke will give up 7 runs in one of the games. I'm not sure which.

Lions: Not a bad start. Gotta admit, that defense looks very un-Lions-like. And Pettigrew only has one fumble so far this year! IMPROVEMENT!

Pistons: Josh Smith and Jennings could be fun to watch. There's a chance they could suck as usual, but at least they'll be fun to watch.

Red Wings: They're the fucking Red Wings. They haven't won a stanley cup in what, five years? I think they're due. They also have the best coach in the NHL who also happens to have the best hair on earth.

[Vinny]

Alright... had a few G&T's and feeling much more positive. New Outlook:

I'm giving them one win because Phil Coke will give up 7 runs in one of the games. I'm not sure which.

Guess who missed the playoff roster!!!

[Tahoe]

Guess who missed the playoff roster!!!

Fuck. Thank God. I'd a shit if he made it.

[Timone]

Mods, please move the above post to the MoTown Detroit Sports Optimism thread, thanks!

[Glenn]

I've got nothing to add here, carry on.

[MoTown]

^Diamond like quality, right there.