Random copypasta

[Vinny]

Nance died suddenly and unexpectedly on December 30, 1996 from an apparent internal head injury the morning after getting into a physical brawl at a donut shop with some rowdy patrons.

[Vinny]

In the book, Ian described an icy relationship at first, to the point where Meat Loaf wanted to “punch my teeth down my throat,” but then said the two eventually bonded one night at the Viper Room, where Meat Loaf performed Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer” with then-cover band Metal Shop (who eventually became Steel Panther). “It was this really great moment between the two of us — a total bonding experience,” wrote Ian. “And from that point on, we were totally bros. Over the years, Meat has gone above and beyond for me, Pearl, and Revel.”

[Mr. Oobir]

I'm worried. People think I have a monkey virus.

I was behind the truck carrying the monkeys. When he got off the exit he keep on going and turned to get on back 80. And that when the dump truck hit the back of the trailer and both went down into where the trees were. I thought the debry on the road came from the dump truck at first. So I pull over and run to check on the driver. I was worried that they were hurt. The driver said I'm sorry I didn't see you. I told him he didn't hit me. That I was behind him and I was worried that people were hurt. driver asked about his trailer I said that the back end was fine but from where I was I couldn't see the front of it. I then noticed someone legs between the fronts seats. I asked if he was ok l. He said his leg was hurt. I told him to stay in the truck until the ambulance came. I didn noticed that they had a white sun visor that covered the passenger side windows Then a retired fire fighter came down to help. So .l walk back unto the road. The person who was on the phone with 911, said he seen a cat run into the woods and that there cats inside the crates. So I went to check on the cats. I pulled back a green cloth. I could see it's brown fur. So I said kitty kitty, I stuck my finger inside to pet it. It made like a grunting nose. So I got a closer look. And a monkey pops up and hissed at my face. At the point I told the guy who was on the phone with 911. That they were not cats monkeys. So I walked around to check on the monkeys. To make sure they were ok and not hurt. And also walk inside the trailer because thete were crates inside. But the floor board was giving out and the guy who called 911 said that it could roll back so I got out. I then walk around more. I noticed that 1 crate was completely broken and and 1 was missing the front end of it. The crate is divided into 3 sections. It holds 3 monkeys each. Each crate had 3 monkeys in it. That's why I said 4 monkeys were missing. The crates were tip over. So I helped turn them over. I did notice that one crates was broken enough that the one monkey could stick his hand out. I walked over to see it. He looked very curious. He was cute and looked scared. So I walk over to see. I then told the police that it could possibly get out. I asked if they had anything to hold it together more so the monkey would not get out. He said he didn't. I even asked about using duct tape. Then I seen the driver. I should it to him. The driver then told me that the monkey were not quarantine yet and not to touch anything. At that point I thought they were zoo monkeys going from one zoo to another. So I walked around. I gave my info to the police. Then I found out there were lab test monkeys. Then I went home. I called my aunt to tell her about it. Because she lives behind were the monkeys ran off too. Because she has a dog. I didn't want her dog to get attacked. I then went to a birthday party. We all talked about the monkeys. My sister said. I always wanted a monkey you should have taken one for my birthday present. Later that I night I was in bed. When my aunt gook called and said she ran into wnep and she told them about how I was there. So she called me to see if I would come in to do the news. I got up and ran in. Did the news and came home. I then hear that they don't want anyone near the monkey. So because I did try to pet one, one hissed in my face. I called the state police to ask questions. I was told to meet Corporal Spade near the crash site. I ask if he csn just call me. They lady so no that I had to go to him. So I went to see him. But he was not there another officer was. There was a white car there. And 3 people get out. I thought it was people that were helping with the monkeys. But it was the news people. The officer said that Spade was on his way. Spade and a Vet doctor from the CDC was with him. I told her about the monkey hissing in my face. I also told her I had a cut. She ask if the monkey bit or scratch me. I said no. I told her I walk through the poop and got it on me. I asked if I should throw away my shoe. Because of the poop she said no. Just to wash them. She told me that I would get a call and letter from CDC and health department. The next day I spoke with a lady from the CDC. That I was low risk for exposure. And what symptoms to look for. And because the symptoms are like flu symptoms and being flu season. If I got any to see my doctor and have them rule out covid first. If that came back negative. That they will do further test. I told her my family has been sick. But because of the monkeys. When I started pink eye like symptoms, runny nose and cough. My temp was. 99.1. So to be safe. I went to Gesinger. I should the doctor my letter and told him what my symptoms were. Because the monkey did hiss at me. And there was monkey poop. And I had a open cut. Where I was not sure were it came from. They wanted to start rabbies shots and medication. To prevent anything from happening.

[Uncle Mxy]

FROM THE DESK OF MR.DENIS K. MONTAG
FUND OPERATIONAL MANAGER
CITI BANK NEW YORK, NY 10016, USA
OUR REF: CBUX0022-ODCS/022
YOUR REF:CBU/WB/IMF/USA-22
E-MAIL: montagm689@aol.com


RE:URGENT NOTICE

THE RECENT LAUNCHED JOINT EXTERNAL DEBT HUB (JEDH) BY THE INTER-AGENCY
TASK FORCE ON FINANCE STATISTICS (TFFS) THIS JOINT LAUNCH IS BY THE
BANK FOR INTERNATIONAL SETTLEMENTS (BIS), INTERNATIONAL MONETARY FUND
(IMF), ORGANIZATION FOR ECONOMIC CO-OPERATION AND DEVELOPMENT (OECD),
AND THE WORLD BANK AND REPRESENTS EFFORTS TO SYNERGIZE INTERNATIONAL
ADVANCES IN THE AREA OF EXTERNAL DEBT STATISTICS. DUE TO THIS NEW
ORGANIZATION, THE WORLD BANK HAS GRATIFIED THE INTERNATIONAL DEBT
MANAGEMENT TO LOOK INTO THE ALL OUTSTANDING CONTRACTORS/WORKERS DUE
FOR PAYMENT WITH US GOVERNMENT. IN REGARDS TO THIS, YOUR NAME WAS
AMONG THE UNSETTLED CONTRACTORS/WORKERS WHO HAVE NOT RECEIVED THEIR
PAYMENTS. I WISH TO INFORM YOU THAT THE INTERNATIONAL DEBT MANAGEMENT
HAS BEEN APPROVED AND INSTRUCTED BY WORLD DEBT ORGANIZATION & WORLD
BANK TO PROCESS AND RELEASE ALL THE OUTSTANDING PAYMENT WHICH HAS BEEN
DUE FOR PAYMENT.

THIS IS TO OFFICIALLY NOTIFY YOU THAT THE WORLD BANK IN CONJUNCTION
WITH THE UNITED STATES SET ASIDE US$3.4BILLION TO PAY IN GOOD CLAIMS
FROM FOREIGN INHERITANCE FUND (NEXT OF KIN); IN LINE WITH THIS
ARRANGEMENT THE UNITED STATES ON FOREIGN DEBT MATTERS (USFDM) ORDERED
THAT CONTRACTORS AND NEXT-OF-KINS WHOSE FILE HAVE SHOWN SUFFICIENT
PROOF REGARDING JOB EXECUTION AND DEBT OUTSTANDING BE SETTLED WITHOUT
DELAY. WE WISH TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR FILE WAS FORWARDED TO CITIBANK
NEW YORK BY VARIOUS OFFICES AND DEPARTMENT SHOWING THAT YOU HAVE
FULFILLED ALL CONDITIONS NECESSARY TO RECEIVE YOUR PAYMENT.


ONE OF THE REASONS YOUR PAYMENT HAD BEEN DELAYED FOR SO LONG WAS
BECAUSE OF COUNTER-CLAIM ON YOUR FUND, THIS NECESSITATED THE PERUSAL
OF DOCUMENTS RELATING TO YOUR CONTRACT PAYMENT, WE WERE CONVINCED BUT
THAT YOU ARE THE BONA-FIDE BENEFICIARY TO THE SAID FUND. THE ATTEMPTS
TO DIVERT YOUR PAYMENT TO FOREIGN ACCOUNT WAS DONE BY YOUR LOCAL
REPRESENTATIVES IN COLLABORATION WITH SOME OFFICIALS AND MOST OF THE
OFFICIALS INVOLVED IN SEVERAL EXECUTIVE MISCONDUCTS HAVE BEEN SACKED.
I HEREBY TO INFORM YOU THIS DAY THAT YOUR INHERITANCE SUM CALCULATED
US$23.3M SHALL BE PAID TO YOU EITHER VIA ATM CARD OR WIRE TRANSFER DUE
TO RULES/REGULATION GUIDING BANK SECRECY ACT(BSA). BE AWARE THAT ALL
NECESSARY MODALITIES CONCERNING THE RELEASE OF YOUR FUND HAVE
REGULARIZED, SO ALL WE REQUIRE FROM IS YOUR HONEST CONCENTRATION TO
MAKE THIS TRANSFER HAPPEN WITHIN 72HRS. FINALLY, KINDLY TICK YOUR
PREFERABLE PAYMENT CHOICE BELOW AND GET BACK TO US WITH DETAILS;

[Mr. Oobir]

"THE ATTEMPTS
TO DIVERT YOUR PAYMENT TO FOREIGN ACCOUNT WAS DONE BY YOUR LOCAL
REPRESENTATIVES IN COLLABORATION WITH SOME OFFICIALS AND MOST OF THE
OFFICIALS INVOLVED IN SEVERAL EXECUTIVE MISCONDUCTS HAVE BEEN SACKED."

That line is especially funny for some reason.

[Vinny]

Wow! I grew up by that house and used to go have tea and cookies with the old woman who lived there. She had a wood stove in her kitchen that she baked in and heated her house with! One day when my brother and I went to see her, she was lying on the floor with a broken hip and had been there two days! She never lived in that house after that. It has been vacant since.

[Vinny]

Dominique Dunne was born to a life of privilege in Santa Monica, California, the daughter of Ellen Beatriz Griffin Dunne and Dominick Dunne, a producer, actor, and writer. Actor Griffin Dunne is her brother. After her parents' divorce, she moved first to New York, and then to a posh home in Beverly Hills. Upon graduation from high school, Dominique went to the University of Colorado to study acting, leaving after one year to pursue her career. Three weeks after arriving in Hollywood, she landed her first gig. Other roles soon followed, notably her role as Dana Freeling, the eldest daughter in Poltergeist (1982), and Dominique was soon well known in the Hollywood social scene. Well liked by all who knew her, Dominique seemed to be at the top of the world. Then, at a party she met John Thomas Sweeney, the chef at popular LA nightspot Ma Maison. The two began a relationship, which turned stormy. Sweeney was uncontrollable and abusive (so abusive that Dominique did not need makeup to play the role of an abuse victim on Hill Street Blues (1981)). Dominique ended the relationship on October 30, 1982. That same night, a distraught Sweeney raced to her house, where she and actor David Packer were rehearsing a scene from V: The Final Battle (1984), dragged her outside, and strangled her, leaving her brain-dead. Five days later, she was removed from life support and died, cutting short a brilliant career and leaving behind scores of shocked and angry loved ones.

[Vinny]

As the media member who interviewed Jim Joyce immediately after the game, this is exactly the right answer. Joyce and Armando Galarraga handled it with honesty and respect, which is why, all these years later, people know what game I mean when I say their names.

[Vinny]

There is so much sexual tension in this spot that it drives me crazy – to the point I am surfing blogs looking for answers about why a Taco Bell commercial is so pseudo-erotic. They need to bring back the grilled stuffed nacho

[Mr. Oobir]

Now that's quality content.