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Thread: Random copypasta

  1. #11
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    ESPECIALLY THE FUCKING CHILDREN

  2. #12
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    My retarded ass gave myself genital herpes. I hate myself and think the world should take some time out and cap my sorry ass. Wanna know how I did it? I went out to a club. But before was sure to clear my lips of all outbreak. I got totally ****faced at the club and got home. I met no women, because I'm a straight loser so I decided to crank up the computer and look at some online porn. I also thought it'd be a good idea to throw some chewing tobacco in my mouth before hand. Well needless to say I didn't even think to wash my hands before self-indulgence. The next day I felt a burning sensation on my dick and looked at it later that night. Nothing, next day though I took another look I have five little tiny zits right where I place my index finger on penis when I whack it. Good thing I used my index finger to pull my lip out to throw a dip in. Now I'm just a total ****ing loser. Balding, with herpes and without a single friend. I am truly an island. I even know who I got herpes from...myself. I just wanna die. I've never had a real girlfriend and if I ever end up with one I'll be scraping the bottom of the barrel. I've thought about putting out a personals add. BALDING WITH HERPES SEEKS GIRL WITH PULSE. I wanna shrivel up into nothing in a world with no one, this plague has made me twenty times shier and than I already was. Please freeze me until a cure is here and I have enough money for some hair plugs. ****, its wasn't so bad when you could say looks don't count. Now I'm just a washed up piece of ****.
    Last edited by Timone; 01-18-2012 at 08:04 PM.

  3. #13
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    Okay, so my girlfriend was supposed to come over to my house today because I was going to go take her to a movie. She lives about 20 minutes away, and the movie we were supposed to see started at 4:15, which was in about 40 minutes. I figured "cool, I'll just play Pokemon while I wait".

    So I'm playing Pokemon, and having a pretty damn good time. Anyway, she finally does show up, except she's crying as she walks into my room. Instead of doing the right thing by comforting her, I half-focus on my game and her. She starts telling me her cat died, and just as she was getting into it, I get into a random encounter in my game.

    A shiny pidgey. Holy shit. (For those of you who don't know/care, shiny pokemon have less than a 1/1000 chance of appearing). I stare into my screen in amazement, yelling "holy shit, YES", interrupting her mid-story. She sobs more, and she starts to yell "You don't even fucking care! YOU JUST WANT TO PLAY YOUR FUCKING GAME!" I'm still looking at my screen, still focusing on catching my shiny pidgey, when she walks over, and tosses the game against the wall. I run over and pick up my DS hoping that nothing has changed on screen, and quickly noticed that she broke it. My system and my shiny pidgey, gone forever.

    I start screaming every obscenity I know, and started flailing my arms around. I didn't know she was behind me, and apparently I backhanded her in the face while I was being a dumbass and swinging my fists around. She yells out "FUCK YOU", and runs out of my house in tears.

    What have I done? I've fucked up so badly, and I need to know how to approach her. I don't want a game of Pokemon to be responsible for ruining my best relationship ever.

  4. #14
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    So we're in this nasty recession. Normal, everyday Americans are struggling to get by. People aren't making enough money to do the things they want.

    HOW DO WE SOLVE THIS?

    I believe the answer is simple: raise the minimum wage to $50/hour.

    Now I know that some of you Neanderthalic, knuckle-dragging mouth-breathers might object to this. But if you do then you're either a flat-out MORON or a corporate shill. Look at the facts:

    (1) People don't have a lot of money
    (2) If the minimum wage is increased to $50/hour, these people will have more money

    It's that fucking simple, fucking idiots. I can't believe I have to explain this shit to you fucking Jesus-loving, Fox-watching, racist, xenophobic, gun-toting jingoists. People who own and run businesses are rich assholes, and it's time we gave them a big "fuck you" for having money by taking it from their greedy hands and giving it to the people who need it.

    Any conservatard that tries to argue with this is just upset that under this plan we'd be giving blacks and other minorities the money previously being hoarded by greedy white capitalist corporatist fucks. Racists.
    Probably the last one. Having a hard time finding stuff worth posting.

    I should have known it'd all be downhill after the M&M story.
    Last edited by Timone; 01-18-2012 at 08:29 PM.

  5. #15
    A person who tells lies. Tahoe's Avatar
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    Just fibbing, you guys!
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    I like Chicken and Pasta better than Copy and Pasta.
    Players meeting my ASS!

  6. #16
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    I like Pastamania, myself:

  7. #17
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    Must have been the work of Comrade:
    “What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your little miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you could have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.”

  8. #18
    Langlois Insider Vinny's Avatar
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    IN MEMORY OF BIG VINNY 1943 – 1979 “WHEN IN DOUBT KNOCK EM OUT”
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    Go Go Gorillas.

    I'm reppin' Jesus Christ and Conservative views....



    Quick piece by VINNY which was a logo style of his. VINNY also did two letter throw up's by the name of FI 2.



    GO WHITE!

  9. #19
    A Great Name Timone's Avatar
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    you feel like punching me in the face? bring it on you ***got. I know multiple fighting styles, and I also carry a switchblade with me at all times. Something ****ing tells me that you'd be better off keeping your arms down at your sides. If you can't ****ing put "cause" and "effect" together in that pathetic brain of yours, I'll help you out here. You'll be standing face to face with me, and let me ****ing tell you, it'll already be too ****ing late to back down at that point. You might decide "well ****, I might as well stay true to my word and throw a ****ing punch". This is where you will go wrong. I hope you don't have a job that requires two ****ing hands, because you're going to be missing one after I'm done with you. I'll casually divert your fist off to the side, as you suddenly realize you may have gotten yourself into something you can't back up. You'll try to regroup and pull your arm back, but that wont be easy when I jab my spear-pointed Benchmade switchblade straight through the bone in your forearm, and proceed to rip your entire ****ing forearm and hand off in one quick pull. At this point, you'll probably spend 2 seconds in shock. I say 2 seconds, because thats the amount of time you'll have before I reverse the knife in my hand, and uppercut it straight through your throat. You'll spend your last few seconds gurgling blood, and wondering where you went wrong. After that, I'll be forced to take care of any witnesses who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Nothing a few quick choke slams can't fix, followed by a nice gentle slice across the jugular with the Benchmade.
    Now, mother****er, you sure you want to go through with that punch?

  10. #20
    There are some bad motherfuckers out there on the Internet. Entertaining writing too.

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