Kosova declares independence from Serbia

[DennyMcLain]

I'm just a typical stereotypical American who really doesn't know shit about the rest of the world. If I knew anything about that part of the world, I'd have something to say...however wrong.

I always thought Albanians were Jessica Alba groupies.

Oh well. Whadda I know.

[Balkan]

Eliza Dushku is part Albanian. Although I can't say anything for the rest of the people.

Ok Nancy, it's time for you to fucking tell everyone why your name is Balkan anyway.

I was born in Croatia. Family fled to America in 1970s and Michigan. Then what was left of the family left Dearborn after Muslims took over.

[Timone]

after Muslims took over.

uh...

[Balkan]

what?

[Big Swami]

Serbians are a unique bunch. They're one of those ethnicities who's always had an irrational sense of national pride, born out of an irrational sense of victimization throughout the centuries.

They are a relatively new ethnicity. They were a pagan Slavic people who were converted to Christianity during the Middle Ages, and all their old folk tales say that the first Serbs came from Kosovo. All the Slavic languages spoken in the Balkans developed out of Old Church Slavonic, of which only a very few records remain. Serbia and Croatia speak what's basically the same language, except the Croatians are Catholic and write it in the Roman alphabet (like us), and the Serbs are Eastern Orthodox and write it in the Cyrillic alphabet (like the Russians).

While the rest of Europe was experiencing the Renaissance, the Serbs were being invaded by the Turks and building up a sense of victimhood and a very strong hatred of everything Muslim. Culturally, the Serbs feel like they have a great deal to be proud of - mostly, religious art. Factually, they're stuck in the era of the Crusades, and they're a bitter bunch of violent drunks who get together every 30 years or so to start up modern-day Pogroms against their non-Orthodox neighbors. And because they're Orthodox, they can always count Russia to be on their side, no matter how stupid they're being.

The Kosovar Albanians are no princes either. They emigrated from their own country (which is a total shithole) and settled in large numbers in a part of Serbia; after a while they just took it for their own. No matter how many Mexicans settle in L.A., they're not seizing it and declaring their independence; that would just be rude.

Basically, the whole region is a goddamn shithouse of freezing mountains, rocks, mines, and unexploded ordinance that no one should be inhabiting, let alone fighting over.

[Timone]

Nothing.

You're Toni Kukoc, aren't you?

[DennyMcLain]

The Kosovar Albanians are no princes either. They emigrated from their own country (which is a total shithole) and settled in large numbers in a part of Serbia; after a while they just took it for their own. No matter how many Mexicans settle in L.A., they're not seizing it and declaring their independence; that would just be rude.

Swami, check your PM's

[Big Swami]

Albanians may be wonderful people, and there may be great Albanian people everywhere from Mother Theresa to John Belushi, but the actual nation of Albania suffers from a terrible economic mismanagement (and former totalitarian government) which has caused generations to flee. Ergo, shithole.

[Timone]

John Belushi was tenuously connected to Albania.

[Tahoe]

I was flying back from Acapulco one time in first class and this lady that sitting next to me(serious fucking world traveler type...nowhatimsayin) was telling me that the most beautiful place she has EVER visited was like right by there I think. Along the sea???

Am I way fucking off on that? Or maybe it was Yugoslavia or something...anyway...off to the 'post here when' thread.