Printable View
My wife woke up at 5:00am today. Then she woke me up.
MRS. SWAMI: My shoulder itches.
MR. SWAMI: What?
MRS. SWAMI: My shoulder itches.
MR. SWAMI: Mmm.
MRS. SWAMI: I can't reach it. Scratch my shoulder.
MR. SWAMI: Okay. There?
MRS. SWAMI: Yes. More. Don't you have any fingernails?
MR. SWAMI: No, I cut them last night.
MRS. SWAMI: You're useless. <SNORE>
Did you guys make that baby yet?
POIDHQuote:
Originally Posted by Glenn
And why not, when the wife makes me feel so sexy?Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn
topic: colon cleansing
Never tried it. I think it might be a fun Thursday night though.
Done it. It was really weird. Not sure if I'll do it again.Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn
While we're on the subject of colons, has anyone seen Beyonce's sister. She is quite possibly the most unfortunate looking sibling of all time. I saw her in a music video (nothing like holding on to your sister's fame) and she was busy trying to do her best Beyonce impression, but it's hard to do when you look like a fucking mule. Talk about drawing the short end of the stick in the gene pool.
It's like a genetic experiment gone horribly wrong after attempting to clone Beyonce.
POIDH
OSTNM
You're sick.Quote:
Originally Posted by DrRay11
She looks "normal" in that picture. Wait until you see a "music video."
MVOIDH
Great site to direct people to who are too lazy / ignorant to use Google.
LOL
It's been a very entertaining day of posting/reading so far.
That should have been number 6000.Quote:
Originally Posted by MoTown
Ledezma's Random Thought On December 2, 2008
This morning I watched True Life: I Have Acne on MTV. I typically don't watch MTV anymore, but I'll tune in for the weekday morning True Life episodes (especially if Steve Doocey is going off on his own tangent on Fox & Friends).
However, I was watching this one episode today, and I thought to myself...if I was seriously in my 20's and still had acne, I'd probably run out in traffic or wear a mask like the phantom of the opera.
That's all.
Is there any way to give someone acne?
#101 should have gone in the confessional thread
Me likes big titties
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn
Do we really need a little Christmas, right this very minute?
Deja Vu's are fucking cool
I am a golden god!
slickery
Man, Queensryche were really bad.
I sometimes get the urge to punch people that wear Bluetooth Headsets on their ear when they're not even on the phone. Take that fucking thing off, you look like a douche.
Quote:
Originally Posted by A Douche
I just bought a bluetooth headset for $5 -- a Samsung WEP200.Quote:
Originally Posted by MoTown
So far, it's mostly been useful for cooking and car errands when I'm prone to get a phone call, but want my hands free and don't want to fumble with the phone. In other words, I'm the dude you want to punch. <duck>
I used a little electrical tape to hide the LED, which is obnoxious and pointless AFAICT. Now it just looks like a large hearing aid, and not some faggoty piece of cyborg geek ear jewelry.
I'll want to punch you a little less if it's not one of the headsets that has different flashing lights and the must-have platinum casing...
People seem edgy today.
I'm in a great mood.
I agree. It's Friday bitches. Stop being babies.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DrRay11
Quote:
Originally Posted by Uncle Mxy
If Michigan's population drops below a certain level, can it rescind back to "territory" status?
49 states, plus the territories of Guam, PR, and Michigan.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyMcLain
Are the U.S. Virgin Islands a "territory"?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wilfredo Ledezma
Quote:
Unincorporated organized territories[edit] Unincorporated unorganized territories
- Guam
- Northern Mariana Islands (commonwealth)
- Puerto Rico (commonwealth)
- United States Virgin Islands
- Michigan
There is also a special kind of unincorporated unorganized territory:
- American Samoa, technically unorganized, but self-governing under a constitution last revised in 1967
- Baker Island, uninhabited
- Howland Island, uninhabited
- Jarvis Island, uninhabited
- Johnston Atoll, uninhabited
- Kingman Reef, uninhabited
- Bajo Nuevo Bank, uninhabited
- Serranilla Bank, uninhabited
- Midway Islands, no indigenous inhabitants, currently included in the Midway Atoll National Wildlife Refuge
- Navassa Island, uninhabited (claimed by Haiti)
- Wake Atoll consisting of Peale, Wake and Wilkes Islands[5], no indigenous inhabitants, only contractor personnel (claimed by the Marshall Islands)
- Certain parcels in foreign countries held by lease, such as military bases, depending on the terms of a lease, treaty, or status of forces agreement with the host country.