“It's easy to grin when your ships come in and you've got the stock market beat, but the man worth while is the man who can smile when his pants are too tight in the seat”?? Is that what you were going for Glenn?
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“It's easy to grin when your ships come in and you've got the stock market beat, but the man worth while is the man who can smile when his pants are too tight in the seat”?? Is that what you were going for Glenn?
In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, 'Au revoir, gopher'
A man may be a fool and not know it - but not if he is married.
-H.L. Mencken
^ Ain't that the truth?
Where is the graveyard of dead gods? What lingering mourner waters their mounds? There was a time when Jupiter was the king of the gods, and any man who doubted his puissance was ipso facto a barbarian and an ignoramus. But where in all the world is there a man who worships Jupiter today? And who of Huitzilopochtli? In one year - and it is no more than five hundred years ago - 50,000 youths and maidens were slain in sacrifice to him. Today, if he is remembered at all, it is only by some vagrant savage in the depths of the Mexican forest. Huitzilopochtli, like many other gods, had no human father; his mother was a virtuous widow; he was born of an apparently innocent flirtation that she carried out with the sun. When he frowned, his father, the sun, stood still. When he roared with rage, earthquakes engulfed whole cities. When he thirsted he was watered with 10,000 gallons of human blood. But today Huitzilopochtli is as magnificently forgotten as Allen G. Thurman. Once the peer of Allah, Buddha and Wotan, he is now the peer of Richmond P. Hobson, Alton B. Parker, Adelina Patti, General Weyler and Tom Sharkey.
Speaking of Huitzilopochtli recalls his brother Tezcatilpoca.
Tezcatilpoca was almost as powerful; he consumed 25,000 virgins a year.
Lead me to his tomb: I would weep, and hang a couronne des perles. But who
knows where it is? Or where the grave of Quitzalcoatl is? Or Xiehtecuthli?
Or Centeotl, that sweet one? Or Tlazolteotl, the goddess of love? Of
Mictlan? Or Xipe? Or all the host of Tzitzimitles? Where are their bones?
Where is the willow on which they hung their harps? In what forlorn and
unheard-of Hell do they await their resurrection morn? Who enjoys their
residuary estates? Or that of Dis, whom Caesar found to be the chief god of
the Celts? Of that of Tarves, the bull? Or that of Moccos, the pig? Or that
of Epona, the mare? Or that of Mullo, the celestial jackass? There was a
time when the Irish revered all these gods, but today even the drunkest
Irishman laughs at them.
But they have company in oblivion: the Hell of dead gods is as crowded
as the Presbyterian Hell for babies. Damona is there, and Esus, and
Drunemeton, and Silvana, and Dervones, and Adsalluta, and Deva, and
Belisima, and Uxellimus, and Borvo, and Grannos, and Mogons. All mighty
gods in their day, worshipped by millions, full of demands and impositions, able
to bind and loose - all gods of the first class. Men labored for generations
to build vast temples to them - temples with stones as large as hay-wagons.
The business of interpreting their whims occupied thousands of priests,
bishops, archbishops. To doubt them was to die, usually at the stake.
Armies took to the field to defend them against infidels; villages were burned,
women and children butchered, cattle were driven off. Yet in the end they
all withered and died, and today there is none so poor to do them reverence.
What has become of Sutekh, once the high god of the whole Nile Valley?
What has become of:
Resheph Baal
Anath Astarte
Ashtoreth Hadad
Nebo Dagon
Melek Yau
Ahijah Amon-Re
Isis Osiris
Ptah Molech?
All there were gods of the highest eminence. Many of them are mentioned with fear and trembling in the Old Testament. They ranked, five or six thousand years ago, with Yahweh Himself; the worst of them stood far higher than Thor. Yet they have all gone down the chute, and with them the following:
Arianrod Nuada Argetlam
Morrigu Tagd
Govannon Goibniu
Gunfled Odin
Dagda Ogma
Ogryvan Marzin
Dea Dia Mara
Iuno Lucina Diana of Ephesus
Saturn Robigus
Furrina Pluto
Cronos Vesta
Engurra Zer-panitu
Belus Merodach
Ubilulu Elum
U-dimmer-an-kia Marduk
U-sab-sib Nin
U-Mersi Persephone
Tammuz Istar
Venus Lagas
Beltis Nirig
Nusku En-Mersi
Aa Assur
Sin Beltu
Apsu Kuski-banda
Elali Nin-azu
Mami Qarradu
Zaraqu Ueras
Zagaga
Ask the rector to lend you any good book on comparative religion; you will
find them all listed. They were gods of the highest dignity - gods of civilized
peoples - worshipped and believed in by millions. All were omnipotent, omniscient
and immortal.
And all are dead.
-H.L. Mencken
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Swami
Too long, didn't read.
-Glenn
Glenn, that would be tl;dr (or tl, dr).
I think this one is applies to the Pistons:
"Fool me once, shame on you...Fool me twice, shame on me"
Art
"Fuck n A" Some dude.
"Kiss my ass" Some dude
"Go fuck yourself" Some dude.
I've always wondered what the meaning behind that was.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tahoe
What did the letter A do to piss so many people off?
Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, well..........umm............you aren't gonna fool me again - George W. BushQuote:
Originally Posted by Sir Douche Baggins
Immortal Technique incinerate degenerate fags
burn Trent Lott, wrapped in his confederate flag
"To shit, or not to shit, where is the toilet?"
--Anonymous
"Fuck a B, it has more holes."Quote:
Originally Posted by Tahoe
Now THAT is a good quote.
"No one dies a virgin, Life screws us all."
- Michael J. Trent
"When I read about the evils of sex and drinking, I gave up reading."
Henny Youngman.
"The masses are asses" - Alexander Hamilton.
Can't get enough of this guy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by H.L. Mencken
Quote:
Originally Posted by Some ad agency hack
"I love it when a plan comes together."
-Hannibal
"Here I sit and write on the walls.
Roll my shit into little balls.
Whomever reads these words of wit, eats those little balls of shit."
-Traditional Men's Room Prose
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work" -Thomas Alva Edison
Reply With Quote
luck is what happens when opportunity meets preperation- robert evans
To be young and not liberal means you have no heart. To be old and not Conservative means you have no brain.
"Ignorant rightists have always viewed leftists as cowards, and ignorant leftists have always viewed rightists as villains, and it seems unlikely in the next fifty years that this should change."Quote:
Originally Posted by Tahoe
In my sig for now, archived here for later.Quote:
Originally Posted by John Hollinger
Sometimes I want to kick that motherfucker in the teeth.
"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
- John Lennon
"In my life, why do I give valuable time to people who don't care if I live or die?...Why do I smile at people who I'd much rather kick in the eye?"
- Morrissey
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tim Robbins, on TV News and entertainment coverage
Dear god, I hope he was being sarcastic.
"Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence." - Robert Frost
"Dana, from the valley of the sun I am perched high above the desert floor and the red streaks of the morning dawn are illuminating this glorious sky. I’m perusing Edward Abbey’s ‘Desert Solitude’ here and on opening day the songs are running through the smoking crater. I’ve been listening to Bob Dylan’s newest album Modern Times which is absolutely remarkable. ‘Thunder on the Mountain’, ‘Spirit on the Water’, ‘Rolling and Tumbling,’ which all go to describe Amare Stoudemire. But the songs that I can’t get out of my mind today John Fogarty’s ‘Center Field’: ‘Put me in coach, I’m ready to play today’ or Bob Dylan’s New Morning and Dana, like you, I’m just so happy to be alive underneath this sky of blue on this new morning, new morning, what could be better than opening day?"
-William Theodore Walton
"Go Bayside!" - AC Slater
"He's the coolest motherfucker on the planet"-SDB on AC Slater
"Lie, Cheat, Steal or Kill" - Roy Martin