Maybe I just need this since my other stories are in the drunk thread, but here is my funny story of the day. If anybody has a funny story or run-in with another person feel free to add to this thread. Else you can just comment on our stories.

Im turning left into a grocery store parking lot. Apparantly this guy that was driving the opposite way down the street I was turning off of thought I cut it too close so he honks, while the passenger yells 'fuck you' and flips me off. So being courteous person I am I gesture back... flip him off and yell 'fuck you'. Just for the record since it basically makes the story, there is an old man pulling into the store lot just in front of me. After walking into the store I hear 'HEY!' and turn around and it's this old man. I was still by the registers and every single person within sight turns and looks at us. Now this guy is old, 70 years old and looking every bit of it. He is also half my size. He gets right in my face and accuses me of flipping him off, yelling the whole time. I politely explain that I was flipping off the guy behind me but he wouldn't buy it. We go back and forth for about a minute before I finally snap and raise my voice yelling 'Dont start shit with me old man because Ill whup your ass!' or something to that effect. Of course I wouldn't hit him first, but I'd finish it and not feel the least bit bad. He says 'What did you just call me?' and I say 'Old man, cuz thats what you are'. Before he says anything else I tell him for the millionth time that I was flipping off the guy behind me, then he winks, smiles, and walks away.

Basically a 70 year old guy who looked old and frail tried to start a fight with me today... a 27 year old guy who works out and was about five inches taller than him. Crazy people in this world I tell ya.

UxKa: Great story, great thread. Hope it gets some action.

Heh... this reminds me of the goth kid that accidentally hit my old beater car ~10 years ago. My dad and I was just getting through with breakfast (#10, Texas toast, medium rare, overmedium, pancakes instead of hash browns) at Leo's on John R. I was driving the both of us in a piece-of-shit beater Ford, ideal when I drove a lot of miles. As we were leaving, this car suddenly pulled out of the parking space, apparently not having seen us. I brake suddenly. The other car stops. <whew> Cool, he saw us.

Then he pulls right back further and hits my car... CRUNCH!

We get out of the car and decide we're not totally upset. No one was hurt and the car still works -- just a cracked plastic fender. Still, I was gonna confront whoever it was that was pulling out. We walk to the guy who hit us and he's still sitting in the car with his girlfriend, damn near cowering.

I'd be listed as 6'5"-6'6" in the NBA -- a pretty big heavy guy. My dad's 6'2", more white haired but even broader... big arms, looks like he's been in a few scraps in his day which he has. This kid is 5'5" tops -- small, skinny, 130-140 lbs., all living life darkly with patchouli, and his girlfriend who's about the same height. The kid has "OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK" written on his face, and as I soon found out, his entire fucking body! I tell him to get out of the car and tell him to take a look at what he's done and he does, meekly. I start barking at him about shit and he's just panic-stricken and not talking.

Then, my dad quips a classic one-liner to the kid: "You're not gonna piss your pants, are you?" and I took a step away because I thought the fucker really would piss his pants and my dad was warning me. His girlfriend showed she had the balls in the relationship and said "you're not gonna hurt us, are you?". With that, he started slobbering about how he'd pay for the damages -- it was pretty fucking pathetic. We told him to to be more careful, take a look out the window when he backs up, and sent them on their way and had a good laugh about it afterwards.

Ha, good one. I usually cuss the hell out of people that hit me. Ive made, I think the number is three 16 yr old girls cry and they probably thought I was going to kick their asses.

It was raining out and I was going to get some food with my girlfriend at the time. I pulled into the turning lane and came to a stop while I was waiting for a chance to turn. Out of nowhere this car flies up behind me, slams on the breaks and slides into my car on the wet pavement. I get out to see how bad it is (maybe a small scratch, nothing more) and the big lady that was driving it gets out and immediately gives me a huge hug and starts asking if I'm ok and asking if my girlfriend was ok, and she's crying and just keeps asking if everyone's ok. There wasn't any damage and we were both fine so I just told her not to worry about it and went to eat. I just couldn't believe she was crying and hugging me so much.