I figured this one could be fun and a way to waste the day away. Make them humorous or make them bold...

This way we can have these predictions in writing and revisit them later on...

NBA:
- The Heat will make the playoffs, but be bounced early because Shaq is too overworked from carrying the team.
- The Mavs will not win the NBA championship, and neither will the Suns.

NHL
- The Wings will get bounced in the SECOND round, thus improving from last year.

NFL
- ***BOLDEST PREDICTION*** Matt Millen will screw up this years draft, and cut himself because he can't draft a receiver.
- Drew Stanton WILL be a better NFL quarterback than Brady Quinn.

MLB
- Neither the Cardinals nor the Tigers will make the playoffs this year.
- Yankee fans will boo A-Rod.

-Various-
- Roger Federer will win the Austrailian Open, the US Open, and Wimbledon, but lose in the French in 2007.
- Tommy Amaker will still be the U of M coach to start next season, after a small run in the NIT.
- Dwyane Wade will be called heroic when he comes back to the Heat this year, even though his vagina is still bleeding.

MoTown:
I was looking at your predictions, was curious about Stanton. I have ragged on Quinn, cuz I think he's the love child of Rick Mirer and Ron Powlus, but Stanton is interesting.
I'm not convinced about the strength of his arm, either. That, and he's a runner. A runner who gets hurt. Alot. I'm thinking he's going to be a clipboard holder as a pro.
I have a BOLD PREDICTION:
Chad Henne, freed from the confines of the Lloyd Carr "Just DON'T FUCK IT UP, and I'LL DO THE REST DICKHEAD" school of thought, will be drafted in the top 10 next year, and will be a fabulous professional quarterback. I can't wait to see him get some real coaching some day. He's going to be better than Russell, Quinn, and Stanton by far. By Mel Farr, in fact (That's really farr).

MoTown Pt 2:
Nice prediction on Federerererer. He's never won the French Open yet. Pete Sampras never did either, and he got some shit for it.
I wonder, if Federerereereeerr never wins the French, will he get some shit?
Of course, Sampras won 14 Grand Slams, and Federereererer might win thirty, so that's a consolation prize.

My Stanton prediction wasn't so much a pro-Stanton standpoint, but more of an anti-Quinn standpoint. Stanton will be a good backup, Quinn will be booed off of whatever field he's drafted to because of expectations.

As to my Federer prediction... it's always been my belief that the best players don't win on clay. Clay is reserved for fast guys with no power.

I might have to side with you on the one about the Tigs and Cards, MoTown. Just have a bad gut feeling.

yeah, wouldn't it be funny if the tigers sucked again this year. What if last year was angels in the outfield all over again.

Bold prediction....

Texas Rangers win the world series.

Kobe Bryant scores 70 points in a playoff game

orlando magic win lottery

orlando magic win lottery

This year? That would suck for us. Not to mention they could have a Howard/Darko/Durant front court. Scary length there.

it has happen to them before in this very same position, weren't they suppose to be 13th pick when they got webber?

I'm not sure which pick they would have had, but they were definatly in the end of the Lotto, yes. They got Shaq when they were bad, and then lucked into Webber/Penny.

New Prediction Alert***
Troy Smith won't get drafted.

Wow. I think he slips, but that arm stregth and elusiveness will get him drafted still IMO. Instead of being a 2nd/3rd round pick after the bowls, I could see him being a 2nd day pick for sure.

Chris:
You are probably right, it's just that I'm hearing he's showing up at combines in not the best shape.
Plus, people are saying that he's very short.
Someone will probably take a flyer on him, but I still think he might end up as a free agent when the draft is done.
It would be to his advantage not to be drafted at all if he's not a first day draftee.

I just think with the Brady success, teams will take a flyer on a QB from a winning program even if the measurables aren't there. If he doesn't pan out you don't risk much.

Stanton (the guy without perfect intangibles) being better than Brady Quinn (the guy getting all the love that will be the #2 QB)

sounds kind of like how Joey is getting booted off teams left and right, but a second round guy without perfect intangibles, brees, got the Saints pretty damn far.

orlando magic win lottery

I'll disagree. Stern doesn't care if Orlando is a hoppin' franchise.

BOSTON will win the lottery. And on the .001% chance that they don't, the Knicks will. You can book that shit right now.


I bet Memphis doesn't even get a top 3 pick - Stern could care less about them.

Watch NY/Chicago win the lotto and get Durant in Chicago to run with the guards. Or watch Minny win the lotto and end up with Oden next to KG so they can finally get him to the finals and ride that story.

I don't believe in the conspiracies, but those would be my picks if I did.

I'll disagree. Stern doesn't care if Orlando is a hoppin' franchise.

BOSTON will win the lottery. And on the .001% chance that they don't, the Knicks will. You can book that shit right now.


I bet Memphis doesn't even get a top 3 pick - Stern could care less about them.

You do realize that the Celtics are in the state they are today partly because they didn't win the Tim Duncan lottery, right?

yeah, but Loof, the NBA needed to build some Texas cred. San Antone was perfect for Duncan, and it threw the true conspiracist off the trail: NOW Boston or New York wins, you can "Bank it Bitches", MoTown called it first, but I'm with him on that one.
Here's the Conspiracy Playout:
San Antone Wins a couple championships.
Tony Parker starts banging actresses
Cleveland gets LeBron (duh!)
Detroit wins a championship
Detroit and Indiana have a huge brawl
Dice-K Matsuzaki in BOSTON (see a pattern here? I thought so!)
Now, here's where it gets a little dicey, and you just have to put the pieces together:
Boston Tea Party
Gordie Howe retires
Led Zeppelin releases cryptic song "When the Levee Breaks"
Craig Ferguson (of SCOTLAND), gets a talk show
Chinese Panda Ling Ling has baby on live TV (and Hall of Fame newsman Ron Burgundy is there to cover it)
And Kevin Durant enrolls at Texas
If you can't see that freight train from a mile away, well, I hope you didn't ever order a pair of X-Ray glasses from the comic books back in the day. I hope you ordered the Sea Monkeys.
It all points to one thing: Boston, which may not win another game this year, wins the lottery and drafts Durant or Oden.

yeah, but Loof, the NBA needed to build some Texas cred. San Antone was perfect for Duncan, and it threw the true conspiracist off the trail: NOW Boston or New York wins, you can "Bank it Bitches", MoTown called it first, but I'm with him on that one.
Here's the Conspiracy Playout:
San Antone Wins a couple championships.
Tony Parker starts banging actresses
Cleveland gets LeBron (duh!)
Detroit wins a championship
Detroit and Indiana have a huge brawl
Dice-K Matsuzaki in BOSTON (see a pattern here? I thought so!)
Now, here's where it gets a little dicey, and you just have to put the pieces together:
Boston Tea Party
Gordie Howe retires
Led Zeppelin releases cryptic song "When the Levee Breaks"
Craig Ferguson (of SCOTLAND), gets a talk show
Chinese Panda Ling Ling has baby on live TV (and Hall of Fame newsman Ron Burgundy is there to cover it)
And Kevin Durant enrolls at Texas
If you can't see that freight train from a mile away, well, I hope you didn't ever order a pair of X-Ray glasses from the comic books back in the day. I hope you ordered the Sea Monkeys.
It all points to one thing: Boston, which may not win another game this year, wins the lottery and drafts Durant or Oden.

I laughed hard about four times reading this.

Thank you Zip.

You do realize that the Celtics are in the state they are today partly because they didn't win the Tim Duncan lottery, right?

And? He lands in Texas (a big market) just to TONS of media talking about how great this team was going to be and how a dynasty was born over night. Right now Boston is on the verge of extinction (not literally, fans still go. I'm just trying to be overly-dramatic). I'm not a huge conspiracy theorist, but I do believe Mr. Stern has a little too much pull around the league.

In his mind the NBA is healthy when these teams are winning: NY, LA, Boston. Boston is the NBA franchise with the most history - do you really think Stern isn't frothing at the mouth with the chance to land the best big man SINCE Tim Duncan?


Howabout a bet? I think 8 alpacas should cover it.

If Oden lands in Memphis, I will respectfully bow to you, proving that Stern really does hate Boston.

What if Miami ends up the 9th seed and wins the lotto (or even a top 2 pick)? I think I would be sick.

Think of the # of free throws that team would take!!!

Their opponents would have to play offense and then if they scored or the Heat got the rebound, they'd just blow the whistle and give each player a turn at taking free throws.

Stern would be the happiest he's ever been.

They'd just impliment that rule where you get the ball back after a make. So they'd just call a foul every time and Miami would always have the ball. They'd win 600-10 with Wade shooting 500 FT's.